Cape May Musing...

Early Morning.  Thunderstorms Rolling.  Windows Open.  Oceans Churning.  Raindrops Falling.  World Turning.

Pen and Paper.  Everything I need.  Just listening to the ocean.  I always wanted a simple kind of life.

A long line made up of spectacular tiny moments of pure joy.  Those split seconds where your heart is so happy.  They are real.  They carry you through.

The more you let the feeling in the more these moments string together.

It is when you stop counting that you realize every second is that moment.

                                                                                        - Cape May -
                                                                                         July 27, 2015

It's the time of the season...for writing...

So...it has been awhile since I have blogged.  But it is indeed the time of the season...for writing.  I was on the fence about whether or not I had another crappy first draft of a novel in me.  Who am I kidding?  Of course I do.  If you put a blank page in front of me...I will fill it.  My one and only party trick.  It is what I do...even if for only one month out of the year.  I never plan.  I just open up a new document, put on my headphones, and let the music in my ears inspire the words that will flow out through my fingers onto the keys of my laptop.  It is a really good feeling.  Like watching soccer.  Like a date with Gym.  Like listening to music.  It just is.

Even if I don't give much attention to my writing throughout the year...it is a big part of what makes me...me.  And in those moments when I think that it is not...I remember this note that my Grandma wrote to me a long, long time ago.  What more motivation does a person need?  So here we go, for the ninth year in a row...I am going to write a novel.  It may never get finished.  It may never be read by anyone other than me.  It may sit on a shelf along with the eight others I have done before.  I won't remember my characters names.  I may not even remember the title.  It doesn't matter.  What does matter...is that I had fun and for one whole month...I made writing a priority in my life.

The Office Ninja...

Me with a Clipboard - Drawn by my Mom

I have written many times before about always being the one with the clipboard...but that is the life of an Office Ninja.  I don't mind it actually...it is good to be able to what I do best and as a result help people.  From the time I was little...I always dreamed of keeping important paper's organized...so it makes sense that being an Office Ninja was in my future.  I have been lucky...after my Junior Year of High School I got a summer job...and the rest is history.  I have been here ever since.

I think I get nostalgic this time of year because I interviewed in late May...started in June...and most of my big career moves tend to happen in the Summer/Fall.  I'm not anticipating anything big on the horizon...but I can definitely tell that I'm ready to slow down.  I know that sounds strange...and I will always have a clipboard...but the stakes of what is on the clipboard don't have to be so high. 

   

A Dose of Reality…

My pretend pancreas...

So…the thing about Type 1 Diabetes is…it is not trivial.  I have spent almost 27 years trivializing it and I don’t want to pay a price for that.  I don’t keep it a secret.  I’m totally fine with people knowing I have it.  But the question is, do I accept that I have it?  Really accept it?  I wonder sometimes.  I am lucky.  I have an intuition.  I trust it.  I meander through my day knowing (based on how I feel) whether my blood sugar is high or low.  I check it in the morning and then go about my day…never checking it again.  I did a marathon without checking it once.  I always figure out a work around.  It always seems easier.  I can’t keep doing this.  It should not be easy.  It is not trivial.

I am really, really lucky…in my almost 27 year relationship with my non-working pancreas…I have had very little complications.  My eyes have had a few laser zaps to preserve my vision.  I see my Retinologist two times a year to keep tabs on things.  It is all about preservation…things never get better with your vision…but you can keep them from getting worse.  This has been the only complication…until I went on vacation.

It was an amazing vacation.  I think it was the first real vacation I have had since I started working the summer after my Junior Year of High School.  It was so good, I forgot that I got a blister just above my right ankle from an amazing pair of Sandals.  Two days later…it started to hurt…I looked down…it wasn’t pretty.  I went to the Doctor at the Resort the next morning.  I got a prescription for a topical medicine.  I never went in the ocean again.  I just had a bad feeling.  It didn’t get any better.  19 days pass.  I am worried.  I go to my podiatrist…he has to use a scalpel to stir the healing process.  I feel worse…then feel better.  I go back in a week…he has to use a scalpel to stir the healing process.  Are you sensing a pattern?  Like anything…wound healing is a process…this will probably go on for a few more weeks. 

I know things happen for a reason.  I know that things happen when you need them too.  I know that I can’t let this slip by without recognizing the fact that I have been lucky…but luck runs out.  I know this happened because of my Type 1 Diabetes…my podiatrist confirmed it yesterday…after giving me massive kudos for my pain tolerance.  This is a lesson.  Whether I am in paradise, at the gym, at work, at a soccer game…no matter where I am and what I am doing…I can’t forget that I have Type 1 Diabetes.  It is not trivial.

Office Ninja Olympics...

Take the time to look up...meeting spaces can be beautiful!!

Before the Winter Olympics...there was the Office Ninja Olympics.  You probably missed it...it wasn't carried on any major networks.  In fact, just a few people witnessed it.  I earned a 10 for jumping a half wall in order to enter a coat closet that was mistakenly locked.  This is what I do.  My life's work is getting people where they need to be...with what they need...once they get there.  I also make sure that people have the information they need to make informed decisions.  I am the Office Ninja.

Of all the things I do, I love meeting/event planning the best.  So many lists.  So many logistics. So many people to please.   So much office ninja opportunity.  No matter how many meetings or events you plan...there is always some hiccup that happens and it becomes part of your work lore.  These hiccups help you to refine your prep lists...as long as the same hiccup doesn't happen twice (unless it is weather-related...because even I know you can't control that).  It is not that I anticipate them, but I do sort of look forward to them.  No matter what...you have to figure out how to smooth the path and keep things moving along.  I love the challenge.  I love problem solving.  I love getting better and sharper.  I love a good addition to my work lore.

I had a meeting late in January...it was one of the best for this one particular group that I gather for an all day meeting twice a year.  The meeting ended...there were no hiccups.  It is winter.  Everyone has coats...they are in a coat closet.  There are some folks who need to catch planes.  There are cabs on the way.  The coat closet is locked.  I call my contacts for the meeting space...no one answers.  They are located off site.  People are getting angry.  The meeting space is actually an old chapel and the coat room has a partitioned wall...with an opening for a "hat check" type of set-up.  One of the attendees has managed to open the partition, but there is a large table blocking the now open space/window.  I tell everyone to ignore the boom that is about to happen.  I push the table, it falls to the floor.  I'm ready to do work...I'm going to jump the wall and open the door from the other side.  I'm the Office Ninja...nothing stands in my way.

One of my workmates pleads, "You are wearing a dress."  I laugh.  "I have on leggings...it is okay."  And then I jump the wall...this is why I go the gym...you never know when you are going to need to hoist yourself up on a wall and swing over.  I make everyone promise not laugh if the weight of me and my boots breaks the table when I land on it.  The table doesn't break.  There is an applause.  I unlock the door.  Coats are retrieved.  Attendees are happy again.  It is still a good meeting.  My record stands.  Then the cabs don't show...so I drive a few folks to the metro.  They are happy.  I am happy.  The office ninja has done it again.  And now...the office ninja is working hard at getting it all done...within an 8 hour window.

Is it the boots??

Birthday Cowgirl Boots...

Early on in the summer, as soon as I knew that my boss was going to be traveling internationally around my birthday...I knew that I wanted to treat myself to a trip.  Timing wise...it was perfect.  My sister would be graduating in December.  My birthday is in January.  We were going to see my best friend (the big sister I never had) in Texas and celebrate!!  I ended up being out of the office for 12 days...some time in Texas...a day trip to Philly for the MLS Superdraft...and then more birthday fun with friends.  It was the perfect birthday week.  But, there is a price for perfect I think.  Since my time off...I have been doing a lot of thinking and planning.  My break in Texas (especially when I was up at 4am doing work emails on my birthday) got me thinking.  Is it really my job that makes me answer emails at 4am?  Or is me?  Is it how I choose to work?  I think the answer to the last two questions is yes...it is me.  So I have been working on changing how I work.  I have Texas to thank for this.  Well...Texas and a recent sick day.  Getting away is good...I'm going to do this more. Maybe next time...I won't check my email!!

Change is scary...but I am getting braver.  If I can finish a marathon...I can do anything I set my mind too.  I need to keep reminding myself of this.  I'm also learning to never say never.  I have always hated Country Music.  I was an east coast kid...schooled in Punk.  I just never got into it.  Since the Texas trip...I have been downloading lots of country music...and enjoying it.  I know, I'm still processing this.  I think maybe it is new state of mind.  Open mindedness. Well, that and my new cowgirl boots.  I think there is magic them.

A few pictures from the best birthday week ever...

Airport Reading...Sir Alex Wisdom...

Lane!!  Still miss this sweet face...

Of course we need picture in the Vera Bradley Store...

It was nice to see flowers...

Always a sucker for a pretty tree...

Amazing Views during a good walk/run... (70 degrees of Beautiful)

These were in the running...for DC United Games...am I right??

A fire pit and good friends...all one really needs...

The perfect welcome gift!!! International Travel will happen!!!

My birthday cake...made by my Mommy...

MLS Superdraft in Philly...VAMOS UNITED!!!

Philly Fun...and there was a video of me hugging our draft pick's Mom.  We also
gave his Grandma and Sister our  DC United scarves.  Very cool experience...

Lots of Laughter over my tracking my own birthday party guest list...
anyone who knows me should not be surprised by this!!

A pub...soccer...friends...all the essentials... :)

Second Morning in the Pub...next day for ManUtd vs. Chelsea... :)  

A perfect birthday...plus a few candles...with each one added...
life get's better and better. 

    

2013 Rewind (October): The Day I Got My 26.2 Miles

It was just over a year ago when I registered for the Baltimore Marathon.  I had always thought about doing one.  Wondering if I could do it.  Visualizing it.  I remember mentioning it from time to time over the years...but I would always say...it would probably be too hard with my T1 Diabetes.  That was an excuse. After registering, when asked why I decided to do it, I would always say that it was something on my "list". That is true, but there was something more.  Not many knew the real reason why I decided to do it.  It was simple.  A few weeks into 2013 I knew I could not decide to have a boyfriend, but I could decide to get myself 26.2 miles.  So that is exactly what I did...

When I mentioned doing a marathon to my trainer/friend Stacy K...she didn't doubt that I could do it.  In fact, she agreed to do it with me.  She had never done a marathon before, so it was something new for her too.  To test the waters...she twisted my arm and got me to agree to do a half marathon in June.  I had never trained for anything...I had never considered myself an athlete...but 2013 changed everything for me.  I trained on my own...but on both race days...Stacy K and I...walking/running...got 14.6 miles in June and then 26.2 miles in October.  Stacy could have easily run the whole thing...but she held back to slowly get each mile.  I can still hear the sound of her Garmin watch with each passing mile. 

 

It took me 7 hours, 30 minutes to finish...that is almost a full work day.  It was bliss.  I was lucky.  I never hit a wall.  I just kept moving forward.  My mind was clear.  It was zen.  I felt fantastic.  I never needed my headphones to pump pulsating music through my ears.  I was able to run/walk the first 12 miles...and then my right knee pain got to a point where I felt like it would be safest to just walk to finish versus risking being in so much pain that I couldn't finish. Not finishing was not an option.  It was cloudy.  It was cool.  It rained a bit.  It was really perfect.  I just kept moving forward.  One foot in front of the other. I had five Gummie Lifesavers every hour.  My non-working pancreas was never an issue.  I listened to my body.  I trained hard.  I trained hard so that I could enjoy each and every moment of race day.  I did.  26.2 miles...through the streets of Baltimore. It was bliss. I had a smile on my face the entire time.

Here is the pictorial documentation of my long weekend...

 

Only one more thing to cross out on the training plan...

All my gear...

Hitting the Road...with my biggest supporters!!

The lucky charms for the journey...my first Camp Fantastic Badge, Camp Bracelet,
Shamrock "Lucky" Earrings (so my Gma would be with me), Charm Bracelet (with Owl...so my Gpa would be with me).

Still running...I think this may have been around 7/8 miles...

Dynamic Duo...

Moving Right Along...

I have no clue what I am looking at...maybe a Starbucks sign?

Shortly after hitting 13 miles...

Getting close to 20 miles...a little bit of rain...determination face...

Getting close to the finish...

Dynamic Duo...Camden Yards...the end is near!!!

 

Just before crossing...they had already closed down, but I moved the barricade...nothing
was standing in my way!!!

My Medal and Me!!!!

My Family and Me...

We did it!!!

Made it to RFK...slightly bleary eyed...but I got there!! Those stairs though...

The next day...at my favorite pub in Baltimore...

My Medal, My Pub, My Magners...

2013 Rewind (August): Baking and Cooking??

The Teacher and the Student

To be clear, I don't just use the kitchen for anyone...my skills are limited.  I toast, I make coffee, I make great scrambled eggs, and I microwave.  I am also good at doing dishes.  When I was in high school and took baking...I just did the dishes.  I also kneaded bread dough...I was pretty good at that too.  I am best at selecting food options from restaurants/stores/caterers and reheating, if necessary.  I can throw together a great menu with excellent food pairings...including desserts!!  But this past August, for my sister's birthday, I decided that I wanted to cook one of her favorite meals (one that Grandma used to make) and bake her a cake.  So I did...with excellent teaching/coaching from my Mom.  I made Chicken N' Gravy (which is chicken cooked in Cream of Mushroom Soup), parsley potatoes, a salad, and a cake.  Another motivating factor was brand new marble counter tops...they were so pretty I was actually inspired to use the kitchen.

My Mom took my enthusiasm and seized the opportunity to teach me lots of things grown-ups apparently should know how to do - for instance - how to quarter a chicken, julienne fruits and vegetables, mix together ingredients for baking, use a mixer, decorate a cake, and many other things.  We had a really good time...we make a good team.  She is an amazing cook and baker...I usually just help with dishes (not as often as I should), design, color, and flavors.  This time...I was all in.  I took pictures throughout the process so that I could remember everything.  Plus, I wanted visual proof that it actually happened.  I cooked!!  I baked!!  I decorated!!

So here is a pictorial listing of how I made a birthday dinner and cake for my sister...

 

Everything I do starts with some notes and lists...

Shopping!!!

 

Baking is done first...and the order of ingredients is important.

Two perfectly finished cakes!!!

Layering Up...I made the orange color too...

You can see the stress...

 

All iced and ready to go...I made the yellow color!!

Starting to decorate with fondant pieces I cut out...what will it be?

The chicken...so gross...but I conquered my fear!!

  

All cut up!!!

All souped up...and ready for the oven!!

Cutting Skills...

My favorite...Grandma's Parsley Potatoes...

 

The table...ready to serve with some 802 Woodchuck!!

A Lion Cake for My Leo Sister!!

 

Ready to Eat!!!

I don't just use the kitchen for anyone... :)