Novel Writing....Remember That?

It is truly ridiculous that I have not written anything novel-related in about three months. I always get down when this happens. My mind starts taunting me with thoughts about how if I was a REAL writer...I would figure out how to continue to write (at least everyday) and continue to make progress on my work in progress or anything really. But I don't do that. Therefore, I am not a writer. Sometimes I feel like a faker...I am in one of those wallows at the moment. I need to get the fever back. I need to put work aside and go back to writing in the early AM before work. That seemed to work a few months back. Maybe I need to make it a goal for this coming week.

Perhaps if I write it down on my "to do" list I will get it done? How sad is that?

Press the Hold Button...

Hello...I've waited here for you...everlong. When I get frustrated on having to wait for things...I should think about that Foo Fighters song. I love that song. It is one of my personal anthems. Problem is...I'm a 'go-to' kind of gal. I like to get things done. I like to check things off of my list. I am always 'on-it'. Although, sometimes, you have to wait on others. I have such a hard time with this. I know that patience is a virtue...that must be why it is so hard. One of my tag lines is to trust the process...but it doesn't stop me from getting all worked up.

The one thing I have to FORCE myself to remember is that no matter how much you stress or worry...things are going to happen when they are supposed to happen. I know this. Yet I still exhaust myself in trying to mitigate disaster. Darn intuition...

Skunky Skunk...

Ever since I started working just about 15 years ago, I have had this silly fear. Since I am an early bird, the thought has occurred to me over the years that being out and about before the sun is up poses some risk. My biggest fear? Being sprayed in skunky yuck juice early in the morning. I know that is crazy...but after my skunk sighting early yesterday AM out of the kitchen window it seemed all too clear that my fear could be realized.

It will be a busy day with lots of meetings. I'll be leaving early. I'll have on a great outfit. A cute Vera Bradley purse. And then it will happen...I will get skunked. Right there before reaching my car I will stop dead in my tracks. Then what will I do? I can see myself become oddly calm and wonder where I could go to take a tomato bath. If only there were a spa I could escape too.

Could you imagine the email I would have to send to my boss and fellow co-workers? I would never be able to escape that one...hey...remember when Joy got skunked? That was classic....

Will I Ever Get to the Finish Line? (Word Count = 97,300)

Well, here I am having increased another 1K worth of words and I am a bit lost at the moment. My characters have done that divergence thing that they tend to do...which is good...but I just keep thinking back to all the work I am going to have to do once I am "done" with this first pass. I know I should just keep pushing through and get this first draft done. Then I can go back and really write this novel.

That sounds so devestating doesn't it? I will finish this first draft and then I will have to go back and really turn it into something. I'm so scared of falling into old behaviors. Will I have the strength and tenacity to do it? No amount of Vera Bradely is going to help me to truly deliver something that people want to read. I know that I can write...but my big fear stens from the fact that I do not have much confidence in my storytelling. I'm trying not to think about this minor huge point...or the fact that I wear it like a crown. Ineptitude much?

Hi..my name is Joy and I am a writer...but I can't tell a story. Hmph...I guess I won't know unless I try right? I WILL finish this novel and clean it up for consumption by those poor souls who are willing to read it. I'm in one of those dark writer moments where a pink cocktail would really help...but it is a work night...so I'll just go to bed.

Here's to a good writing AM before work at Starbucks...with my lovely pink laptop and fabulous bag in tow.

I did it!!! (Word Count = 80,122)

I will hopefully finish Chapter 9 tonight and then I think I am at the halfway point. Although, I know that things will be trimmed a bit in my revision phase because some of those "get your numbers up" sections tend to ramble a bit. I am very excited that I have been able to continue on past the 50K mark and now my only fear is that without the NanoWrimo Word Count check-ins I will lose momentum. I need to make sure that does not happen. That can not happen!!! Lolly's story must be finished. And then revised. And then shared with my writing friends.

I am off to Whole Foods to scrounge up some dinner...and then I hope that I can finish up Chapter 9.

So Slow.... (Word Count = 73,170)

This is the slowest day ever. I have had the laptop open and have been sitting here watching TV and Movies. Only 2K words so far. I feel like a NanoWrimo Failure today...UGH!!! It makes me really wonder if I have set the bar too high this time. 80K by tomorrow? I am really worried that I am not going to get there. One of the things that has been different this year is that I need quiet to get the words out. In years past, I have been able to pound out the words no matter the surroundings. This year is not like that at all. Here's to hopefully finding some quiet later on to get more words.

I'm close to declaring that I should get my purple bar when I reach 75K. That would give me the extra motivation I need to keep going. I am freaking out about the 80K now. So freaked out...it is like the words can't come out fast. This never happens...what the heck is going on?

Perfect Desk Accessory...

Lolly Friar would so have a paper weight just like this one on her desk. Is it not the coolest thing you have ever seen? One of the things I love best about Lolly is that she is totally on the ball and doesn't miss a beat...but in terms of anything not work or family related she is a total spaz. This is part of the problem I have been running into. She is serious and flighty. Chick Lit stories are not serious. So, I guess I need to change her? Could I pull off something that is a mix? But that is not true to the genre...

Well, I guess I can sort that out after the first draft is done. I want her to be unique but I don't want people to yawn over her and get bored. I hope I can figure this all out. I must figure this all out. I owe it to Lolly to give her a nice clean space to live and breath and fail and succeed. I will not let laziness take hold. I will not just set her upon the shelf and let her waste away in a cute Vera Bradley binder. This time will be different. This time must be different. But...I am still afraid. Of what, I have no idea.